An influencer couple is speaking out after their videos about their “strict” parenting style went viral.
Ssonia Ong, known online for her family account, the Ong Squad, shares content about life with her husband Kevin and their five children. She recently responded to comments on a video where the pair explained the rules they set for their kids.
“May as well set the bar high,” Ong wrote in the video caption to her nearly 11 million TikTok followers. The post laid out the couple’s expectations for their children’s education.
In a statement to PEOPLE, Ong explained the reasoning behind the rules. “We created these rules as guidelines based on what we know and what has worked well in our experience,” she said. “We are not authoritarians and recognize that every child is different, each with their own strengths and personality.”
Ong also emphasized the importance of open communication. “It is said that strict parents make sneaky kids. There is probably some truth to this. That’s why we ensure our kids understand the reasoning behind the rules. If they internalize good values, they can make better choices in the future.”
The couple listed five rules around schooling, but one stood out: “Straight A’s are expected,” read the text in the video, as one of their children danced across the screen.
That rule drew the strongest reactions online. Many commenters argued it was too much pressure. One wrote, “I disagree with the straight A’s… too much pressure.” Another added, “Getting straight A’s is too much pressure. Both A’s and B’s are good.”
Ong clarified that their children would not face punishments for falling short. “One of our kids has ADHD and needs extra support,” she explained. “Their diagnosis does not define them and neither do their grades. Our message is that through hard work and perseverance, with the right supports, they can achieve their goals.”
Another debated rule was the couple’s stance that college is a must. Some commenters pushed back, saying success doesn’t require college. “College should be a choice,” one wrote. Others defended the rule, saying they appreciated parents who pushed them toward higher education.
Ong stressed that no child would be “kicked out” for not attending college. She also agreed with those pointing out the value of trade careers, writing, “Trades are very much needed and the payout is 👌.”
Other household rules include reading for at least 30 minutes a day — with unlimited books provided to support the habit — and limiting screen time to weekends. Ong admitted that one child doesn’t enjoy reading, so they use audiobooks and comics instead.
This isn’t the first time the couple shared their rules. In June, they posted a broader set of guidelines: no social media until 16, no sleepovers outside the home (though friends can stay over at their house), no crop tops, and no dating until college.
Ong said she is especially cautious about social media. “There is evidence to suggest that social media use is linked to depression. Our hope is to delay in order to protect their real-life interactions, sleep, and mental well-being.”
Some viewers argued the rules weren’t strict at all. “Guys, this is NOT strict, it’s basic rules 😭,” one commenter said. Others predicted the kids might bend them, particularly the dating rule. Ong replied, “You might be right.”
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A graduate of Stanford and Harvard, Ong said she and Kevin — who was in medical school when they met — benefited from waiting to date seriously. “It allowed us to focus on our academics and establish our career paths early on,” she said.
“Our kids have said they want to be doctors and we are trying to prepare them for what will be a long and arduous journey,” Ong added. “At the end of the day, we want them to be successful in both their careers and their relationships.”
