Jennifer Lopez Gets Honest When Asked If She’s Ever ‘Truly Been Loved’: ‘They’re Not Capable’

During her first appearance on SiriusXM’s Howard Stern Show on Oct. 15, Jennifer Lopez opened up about love, self-discovery, and what she’s learned from her relationships.

When Stern, 71, asked whether she’s ever truly been loved, Lopez, 56, paused before answering, “No.” She clarified that while she hasn’t felt truly loved by another, she has experienced what it means to truly love someone else.

“What I learned is, it’s not that I’m not lovable — it’s that they’re not capable,” she explained. “They gave me what they had. They gave me all of it, every time — the rings, the houses, the marriage, everything. But…”

Lopez admitted that part of the problem was internal. “I didn’t love myself,” she said.

Lopez, who has been married four times — most recently to Ben Affleck — shares 17-year-old twins, Max and Emme, with ex-husband Marc Anthony.

Reflecting on her last divorce, she described it as a turning point. “It was the best thing that ever happened to me,” Lopez said. “It made me go on a journey — I had a religious coach, a therapist, a couple’s therapist, a coach to understand addiction. I had everything. I was like, ‘I’m gonna figure this out if it kills me.’”

Through that process, she realized, “The core of the thing is you — it’s nobody else.”

Now, Lopez says she feels grounded in self-awareness. “I’m able to sit here in a much more self-assured way, knowing who I am, understanding my past — my parents, my relationships, my sense of love and neglect. I can finally appreciate and feel comfortable with myself, with all the good and complicated parts.”

When Stern asked if she’d ever shared that kind of deep connection with someone else, Lopez admitted, “Glimpses.” Stern responded, “I wish that for you,” to which she simply thanked him.

Affleck, who produced Kiss of the Spider Woman — Lopez’s latest project — and reunited with her at the film’s New York City premiere earlier this month, has also spoken about their relationship.

In a March interview with GQ, the actor said Lopez is “somebody I have a lot of respect for,” emphasizing that their breakup involved “no scandal, no soap opera, no intrigue.”

“There’s a tendency to look at breakups and want to identify root causes,” Affleck said. “But honestly, the truth is much more ordinary. It’s just a story about people trying to figure out their lives and relationships, like we all do.”

Kiss of the Spider Woman is now playing in theaters.