A new mom is wondering if she may have crossed a line when she tried to nudge her in-laws into making their home more baby-friendly.
In a post shared on the AmIInTheWrong subreddit, she explained that she and her husband recently welcomed their first child — also the first grandchild on her husband’s side. Naturally, she said, her in-laws were thrilled.
“His parents are quite involved and we visit with them often,” she wrote. “They only live 10 minutes away and we go to them because they want us to bring our dogs to their house, too.”
However, every visit has become a bit of a hassle since her in-laws don’t have any baby gear at home. “I bring the pack n play, toys, bouncer if I need it, tummy time stuff, the lot,” she explained. “I’ve provided backup clothes and backup diapers (we do cloth) and even my own wipes to keep at their house for emergency changes.”
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She and her husband had hinted that the in-laws might consider getting a few items of their own to make visits easier, but they didn’t seem interested. When she brought it up again — this time sending them a link to a local baby sale and offering to help pick out “mom-approved stuff” — they brushed off the suggestion.
“My parents have a designated grandkid playroom, so I don’t understand why my in-laws aren’t matching that energy,” she wrote. “Am I in the wrong? Should I just buy twice the stuff for their house if I want it there?”
The post drew hundreds of comments from users offering their perspectives.
One person suggested that she simply ask permission to leave some essentials at their house: “If they say yes, then you should buy the extras. It’s your child, and it’s not fair to ask them to buy all this stuff.”
Another added, “If you’re expecting certain amenities for your child at their house, you should provide them. Either bring them with you or buy double and leave a set there. It would be nice of them, but it’s not really their responsibility.”
Someone else offered a practical solution: “They only live ten minutes away. You don’t have to stay for hours — and stop taking the dogs. If they want to see them, they can come to you.”
