Woman Says Her Boyfriend Isn’t Speaking to Her Because She Doesn’t Want to Spend New Year’s Eve with His ‘Pothead’ Friends

A 29-year-old woman says her boyfriend has been giving her the cold shoulder because she doesn’t want to spend New Year’s Eve with his friends.

In a post on Reddit’s “Am I the A——?” forum, she explained that she and her 33-year-old boyfriend have been together for five years. Her post, titled “Don’t want to spend NYE with my boyfriend’s pothead friends,” detailed how the last two New Year’s Eves — 2021 and 2022 — were spent with his group, both times at his request.

She wrote that those nights were unpleasant for her, describing “crappy music, crappy conversations [and] crappy food” among his friends, who “smoke pot every day.” Since neither she nor her boyfriend use marijuana, she said they “just sat there watching them get high,” before sleeping on a cold floor.

The woman added that during their most recent celebration, her boyfriend failed to prioritize her feelings. She had even left a trip with her friends and family early to be with him, only to feel hurt when he didn’t make the evening special for them as a couple. “I was incredibly hurt, and to this day he’s failed to take responsibility for it,” she wrote.

When her boyfriend suggested spending New Year’s Eve 2025 with his friends again, she declined. Instead, she proposed they plan something together — just the two of them — or spend the night separately. He initially agreed to “look into organizing a trip,” but three weeks later told her he still wanted to go to his friends’ gathering and expected her to come along.

“Now I’m upset that he said he would organize something but had no intention. His plan was always to guilt trip me into spending NYE with him and his waster friends,” she said, noting that he’s now ignoring her.

Commenters on Reddit largely sided with her. Many told her that her feelings were justified and that she shouldn’t feel obligated to spend another miserable evening for his convenience. One user wrote, “You should never feel obliged to be miserable for somebody else’s convenience, especially at ‘special’ times of your year.”

Another commenter added, “Why are you still with this tool? Move on and find someone who respects you and actually likes you, because this guy ain’t it.” Others echoed that her boyfriend was guilt-tripping her instead of respecting her boundaries and their relationship.