Grieving Widow Couldn’t Bring Herself to Move Her Late Husband’s Car. Then a Neighbor Threatened to Tow It

A grieving woman turned to Reddit for support after her neighbor repeatedly left passive-aggressive notes on her late husband’s car — a vehicle she hasn’t been able to move since his tragic death.

“This is gonna sound stupid but I don’t know what to do anymore and I’m tired of crying about it,” she began. Her husband died seven months ago in a car accident at just 33 years old. His 2019 Honda Civic has remained parked in the same spot outside their home since the day before the crash.

She confessed she hasn’t been able to touch it. “I know I should. The registration expired two months ago. It just sits there. But every time I think about selling it or moving it or doing anything with it I just… can’t.”
For her, the car isn’t just an object — it’s a living piece of memory. “It’s the last physical thing of his that still feels like him,” she wrote. “His coffee cup is still in the cupholder. His sunglasses are still on the dash. There’s a grocery list in his handwriting in the console.”
Each of those details, she said, feels sacred.

Her husband had loved that car — always kept it spotless, always parked it in the same place. But one neighbor, whom she calls “Rick,” didn’t share that sentiment.

“My neighbor three houses down, let’s call him Rick, has been leaving notes on the car,” she explained. The first one, about a month ago, demanded she move the “abandoned vehicle.” She ignored it — there’s no homeowners’ association, and no parking shortage. Two weeks later came another: “Abandoned vehicles are an eyesore and bring down property values. Move this car immediately.”

Then came a third: “This is your final warning. If this car is not moved by Friday, I will call the city to have it towed as an abandoned vehicle.” That’s when she said she “lost it” and went to confront him face to face.

Standing at his door, she told him, “Stop leaving notes on my husband’s car.” Rick, she recalled, just replied, “Then move the abandoned vehicle.”
When she told him her husband had died, his expression changed — but his stance didn’t.
“‘I’m sorry for your loss,’ he said, ‘but that doesn’t change the fact that the car is taking up street parking and hasn’t been moved. Other people need to park there.’”
She pointed out that there were “six empty spots on this street right now.” Still, Rick persisted, reminding her that the registration had expired and that he was “within his rights to report it.”

She told him to do what he needed to do — but to stop harassing her. “Then report it. But stop leaving notes on my dead husband’s car,” she said.

A few days later, her worst fear came true. “He called the city,” she wrote. “Yesterday someone from parking enforcement came by and left a citation on the car. Says I have 72 hours to move it or renew the registration or it’ll be towed.”

But that wasn’t simple. “I can’t renew the registration because the title is in my husband’s name and sorting out the estate stuff is taking forever,” she said. She also doesn’t have the car keys. “They were with him when he died, and I never got them back from the police evidence or wherever they are.”

Beyond logistics, she simply can’t bear to move it. “I want it to stay there forever in the same spot, like he’s just at work and will come home and drive it again,” she said. Keeping the car there feels like keeping him close.

Her sister told her she’s being unreasonable — that “the car is just a car and keeping it there isn’t bringing him back.” Her therapist, meanwhile, gently reminds her that “grief doesn’t have a timeline” and that she might be “avoiding processing by holding onto physical objects.”

Still, the notes continued. “Rick is still leaving notes,” she said. “Yesterday’s note said ‘72 hours or I’m calling the tow company myself.’”
Overwhelmed, she sat inside the car that night for hours. “It still smells like his cologne. I cried for two hours,” she wrote.

She knows reality is catching up. “I know I have to do something. I know I can’t keep the car parked there forever with expired tags. I know it’s not rational,” she admitted. “But moving it feels like losing him all over again. Once it’s gone, everything’s really gone.”

“I don’t know if I’m posting this for advice or just to vent,” she continued. “Probably both. I just hate that this neighbor won’t leave me alone about it. Like I get that technically he’s right about the registration, but does he have to be such an a—— about it?”

Her post ended on a heartbreaking note: “My husband would know what to do,” she wrote. “He always knew what to do. I miss him so much.”

In the comments, one user gently encouraged her to care for the car as a way of honoring him. “If your husband took good care of the car, then please honor him by looking after it,” they wrote. “Vehicles don’t do well when left unmoving.”

The woman responded with renewed resolve. “I’m gonna try to sort out the title stuff this week so I can renew the registration,” she said. “And I’ll look into getting a new key made.”
She admitted that grief can make people hold on tightly — sometimes irrationally. “Yeah maybe I am [being selfish],” she wrote. “Grief makes you selfish sometimes. I’m working on it.”

Even so, she added, “Rick left another note this morning. I didn’t read it. Just threw it away.”