Man’s Ex-Girlfriend Wants Custody of His Niece That She Barely Parented. He Refused, and Now She Wants to Take ‘Legal Action’

A 25-year-old man is looking for outside perspective after his ex-girlfriend demanded time with the child he’s raising — even though the girl isn’t his daughter.

In a post on the AITAH subreddit, the man explained that he had been in an on-and-off relationship for years with a 24-year-old woman he calls “H.” Nearly three years ago, his life changed dramatically when his older sister disappeared without warning and has not been found since. She left behind her 5-year-old daughter, “G,” and as the only sibling over 18, he stepped in to take care of his niece.

At the time, he said his relationship with H was already unstable. The two had recently reunited after a breakup, and he described the situation as “violent” and unhealthy. Still, he felt he had no choice but to take G in.

He added that H never truly bonded with the child. Instead, he claims, much of the next two years was spent dealing with H’s complaints about G living with them. According to him, H repeatedly pushed for “adjustments” to G’s “housing situation,” making it clear she didn’t want the child around.

Several months ago, the couple broke up again. He expected that to be the end of it — but two months later, H began talking about “custody agreements,” allegedly acting as if G were a child they shared together.

The man said he was stunned by the demand, especially because H has no legal connection to G. He believes the request is less about the child and more about continuing to control or punish him after the breakup.

He also noted that G doesn’t see H as a parent. While H insists she is the “closest thing” to a mother figure in the girl’s life, he argues that G understands who her real mother is — and that H isn’t her.

When H first brought up custody, he says he shut the idea down immediately, telling her no and ending the conversation. His mother, who remains friendly with H, later told him his reaction was too harsh. But he insists he’s protecting his niece from someone who never wanted her in the first place.

H has reportedly threatened to take legal action. The man says he doesn’t believe she has any standing, but he’s worried about what she might attempt and how far she could push the situation.

He ended his post by asking whether he’s wrong for refusing to let his ex-girlfriend see G or pursue any kind of shared custody.

Most commenters sided with him, saying he has every right — and responsibility — to keep his niece safe and stable. Some urged him to consult a lawyer anyway, just in case, and to take precautions if the ex continues to escalate.