After Years of Being Criticized by Her Family, Teen Decides She’s Done. Now They’re Calling Her Selfish

A teenager turned to Reddit for guidance after years of what she described as hurtful, dismissive behavior from relatives who never made her or her parents feel welcome.

On her father’s side, she wrote, there are only three cousins and “everyone on my father’s side is very close to each other,” yet she never felt like part of that circle.

Over time, she began to notice that “none of my dad’s siblings really respect him,” explaining that her aunts often shut her mother out of conversations. She recalled times when her mom would walk into a room and try to join in, only for the others to sit there briefly before moving to another room to continue their conversation without her.

She also recounted how big and small household decisions were made without her parents. “They would tell the neighbors but not my parents,” she wrote, describing a pattern that repeatedly sidelined her family.

According to the teen, the treatment stung even more because her father had sacrificed his early adulthood to support his siblings after their father died. “My dad was like 20 years old when his father died,” she explained, adding that he worked hard so his siblings could study and chase their own ambitions — yet they still dismissed him.

The teen said the disregard often extended to her and her belongings. After one birthday, her mom had carefully stored leftover party supplies in a cupboard. Days later, they found the items thrown all over the floor. “My aunt was sitting and chilling like nothing happened,” she wrote, saying the aunt had objected to her things being kept in the “common cupboard.”

Her mother, she said, had gone out of her way for years to be kind, buying things for her sisters-in-law whenever she shopped for her own family. But one day, her mom discovered a box she had gifted an aunt “thrown on the floor,” and again the aunt acted as if it were nothing. That, the teen said, was the moment her mother stopped trying.

The teen described experiencing similar slights herself, especially when it came to outings. Her cousins would be invited while she was left behind. “This one time when we were really young, they took my cousin sis and left me crying and my neighbor aunty consoled me,” she wrote. “My aunts’ logic was ‘we can’t take care of two kids.’ ”

Alongside the exclusion, she said, her aunts made repeated comments about her appearance.

Meanwhile, they stayed in regular contact with her cousin through calls, texts and social media, but rarely — if ever — reached out to her. Feeling unwanted, she slowly stopped seeking their attention. “I don’t visit them much,” she admitted, noting that her withdrawal only led to more criticism.

Her uncle, she said, often complained that she “ignores them and doesn’t ever visit or talk,” while refusing to acknowledge the family’s past treatment of her. When her mother brought up the time they ignored the teen’s crying, he brushed it off, saying, “Let’s not bring [up] past matters.”

Despite this, she said her father remained respected by extended relatives outside his immediate siblings. “They talk to my dad about everything because my dad has always helped everyone,” she wrote, underscoring how different his reputation is beyond his own brothers and sisters.

After she shared her story online, commenters encouraged her to prioritize her own well-being. One person told her, “It’s your decision who you wish to interact with in your life,” and reminded her that “DNA does not make family.”

Another urged her to stop investing energy in people who made her feel unwanted: “Stop trying, they have made it clear how they feel about you and it’s their fault, not yours. Spend your time with your awesome dad and help him ignore them, too. As for their shit talking, ignore that as well. Just because they are blood does not mean they are family.”