Wedding Guest Refuses to Shave Her Armpits Before Friend’s Wedding Despite Hints from Bride and Groom: ‘That’s Their Problem’

A wedding guest says she’s now in an awkward stand-off with a bride and groom after refusing their request to shave her armpits for their big day.

The 26-year-old shared her story on Reddit’s “Am I the A——” forum, explaining that she stopped shaving her underarms a few years ago because she sweats heavily and finds that having hair actually helps. According to her, the hair keeps her from getting “swampy” and prevents deodorant and antiperspirant from immediately sweating off. She also has very sensitive skin and says shaving gives her “horrible rashes and razor burn.”

She stressed that her decision not to shave is “entirely personal.”

Her friends are planning a destination wedding in Mexico next summer, with several events that will involve swimsuits or outfits that show her armpits.

Thinking ahead, the Redditor asked about dress codes for the different events. She says both the bride and groom told her they weren’t strict about dress codes as long as everyone was “well-groomed.”

“I figured I knew what that meant, considering I do work a professional job, but then they took this conversation as an opportunity to warn me that some other wedding guests may be uncomfortable with the fact I don’t shave,” she wrote.

The poster reminded the couple that they invited her knowing she doesn’t shave her armpits. Their response, she said: they assumed she would shave “for special events” where she needed to “look presentable.”

She pushed back, saying she always looks put-together for important occasions and that shaving her armpits “has nothing to do with it.” Her stance was simple: “If people take issue with it, then that’s their problem.”

Now, she says the bride and groom are accusing her of “trying to take attention away from their wedding by making a political statement.” She insists it’s not a statement at all, just a “personal preference,” but says the couple brushed her off with a “whatever you say.”

At this point, they haven’t told her she’s uninvited if she doesn’t shave, so she still plans to go to Mexico and continue her usual routine of not shaving.

But she admits the comments have made her second-guess herself and wonder whether she’s actually in the wrong.

“Again, they know I don’t shave and haven’t for years. I wasn’t even thinking about my armpit hair until they brought it up,” she wrote. “I even said I can trim it a little, and they said ‘it would still be very distracting.’”

“They’re making me feel like an a——, that’s for sure, but am I REALLY the a——?” she asked Reddit, looking for outside opinions.

In the comments, some users felt the couple had gone too far by policing her body hair and appearance.

“They basically called her unpresentable, hinted that a lot of people would be weirded out (which means they will be), and gaslighted her into thinking she’s making a problem,” one commenter wrote, before adding, “Shave the friends, keep the armpit!”

Another commenter admitted they personally don’t like seeing armpit hair on women but still felt it wasn’t their place to say anything.

“I’m really put off by underarm hair on women. I simultaneously know that there is no logical reason for me to feel that way, and I should keep my stupid opinion to myself. If I don’t like seeing it, I can do something radical like shift my eyes three feet to the left,” they wrote, adding that they would never ask someone to shave just to make them more comfortable.