Woman Says Her New Roommate Has ‘No Boundaries’ About Using Things That Aren’t Hers: ‘I Feel Disrespected’

A 23-year-old woman says she’s struggling to get comfortable with her new living situation — mainly because her 35-year-old roommate, she claims, “has no boundaries.”

Posting on Reddit’s “Am I the A——?” forum, the woman wrote that her roommate has repeatedly used her belongings without permission. The biggest issue, she says, is her space heater.

“It’s extremely cold here,” she explained, adding that she usually keeps the heater in the living room because her bedroom stays warmer. When her roommate first asked to borrow it, she agreed — but only on the condition that it would be returned whenever she needed it.

At first, that seemed fine. But now, the woman says her roommate wants access to her bedroom to take the heater even when she isn’t home.

She shared an example from the same day: while she was at work, her roommate texted, “Hey, you don’t mind if I use your heater while you’re not here.” The woman noted it didn’t feel like a question — more like an assumption — and she didn’t respond.

Frustrated, she wrote that if her roommate needs a heater, she should buy one herself. She also admitted this is her first time living away from home and out of state, so she isn’t sure what’s considered “normal” roommate behavior.

Her mom advised her to keep things peaceful — either let the roommate use it or store it in her room and lock the door. But the woman said she’s trying to avoid drama while still protecting her boundaries, especially because she feels her roommate is already pushing them.

She ended her post by asking other Reddit users if she was being unreasonable for not wanting her roommate to use the space heater.

Most replies backed her up. One commenter wrote that she doesn’t need any special justification to say no, while another admitted this exact kind of situation is why they worry about having roommates at all. A third suggested she address it directly now — before the pattern gets worse.