Woman Says Mother-in-Law Visits at the ‘Most Inconvenient’ Times, but Husband Tells Her to ‘Stop Whining’

A night-shift nurse says she’s reaching a breaking point over weekend visits from her mother-in-law — and feels even more frustrated because her husband refuses to support her.

In a post on the Reddit forum “Am I the A——?”, the woman explained that she works nights and is currently the primary earner in her household. Despite that schedule, she says her mother-in-law “insists” on coming to their home every Saturday and Sunday to see her granddaughters, typically between 1:30 and 3:30 p.m.

For the nurse, those afternoon hours land right in the middle of her sleep window. She said the visits force her to wake up and make conversation when it feels like “the middle of the night.”

She added that her mother-in-law has few obligations and chooses a time that consistently disrupts her rest. When she’s tried to talk about adjusting the schedule, she says her husband dismisses her concerns, accuses her of “whining,” and tells her things like other people deal with difficult work hours too — and that she should “deal with it” because his mother is older.

At the end of her post, the woman asked Redditors who they thought was in the wrong: her, her husband, or her mother-in-law.

In the comments, many readers told her she wasn’t at fault and urged her to protect her sleep and wellbeing. Some suggested setting firm boundaries about when visits can happen — including limiting access to the kids if the mother-in-law refuses to choose a time that works for the household.

Others focused more on the husband’s behavior, saying the way he speaks to his wife is the bigger problem. Several commenters called his responses a major red flag, arguing that it should be his responsibility to enforce boundaries with his mother rather than belittle his spouse. A few went further, advising the nurse to seek legal advice and consider whether the relationship is healthy long-term.