Man Cancels Third Date After Learning Woman Has a Life-Threatening Peanut Allergy, Says He Won’t Change His Diet

A man turned to Reddit for perspective after a dating situation ended awkwardly—and faster than he expected.

He explained that a friend had set him up with a coworker, insisting they were “perfect for each other.” The pair met for coffee first, then went on a second date at a botanical garden.

During that outing, the woman shared an important detail: she has a peanut allergy she described as life-threatening. He said he sympathized, recognizing how stressful that must be.

Despite the serious disclosure, they still planned to see each other again. “We arranged for a lunch date this week at the end of the date,” he wrote, making it seem like things were moving forward.

But afterward, he started thinking about how much peanuts are part of his everyday life. “I love peanuts and eat them all the time,” he admitted, adding that peanut butter was all over his home—and even on his dog’s toys.

That reflection led him to a blunt conclusion: he didn’t believe a serious relationship could work without major changes he wasn’t willing to make. “I can’t see a potential relationship with this woman ever progressing to a serious stage without me changing my diet and habits,” he wrote.

Since they’d only gone out twice, he decided ending things quickly would be more respectful than continuing. He called to cancel their upcoming lunch date.

When she asked to reschedule, he chose to be honest. He apologized but said he didn’t think they were compatible long-term, explaining he didn’t want to risk putting her in danger.

The conversation soured once he shared his reasoning. According to him, she pointed out that there are safety precautions that could reduce the risk. He responded that he understood, but didn’t want to take those steps.

That didn’t land well. He said she responded with a sharp “wow,” called him immature, and ended the call.

Afterward, the situation spilled into their shared social circle. He said she told their mutual connection, and his friend later reported that the coworker thought he was a “massive jerk,” while also calling his reasoning “definitely weird.”

Reddit commenters were split. Some backed his decision, arguing that stepping away early was better than risking a dangerous situation later. One summed it up bluntly: “You like peanuts more than you like her. That’s fine.”

Another agreed that two dates didn’t require a major lifestyle overhaul, adding: “Two dates isn’t a commitment, certainly not a point where you plan to make major changes to your life to accommodate her serious allergy. Honestly I think you were being extremely considerate.”