Bride Wants Her Future Mother-in-Law to Wear a Fabric She ‘Hates’ at Wedding. Her Fiancé’s Sister Thinks She’s Out of Line

A bride-to-be has sparked tension with her fiancé’s family after making an uncommon wedding request—one that hit a nerve with her future mother-in-law in particular.

In a post shared to Reddit’s “Am I the A——” forum, the 21-year-old said she’s getting married in February and has spent the last year planning the celebration. But she wrote that the process has become strained after her future sister-in-law accused her of not considering her fiancé’s family while making decisions—especially when it comes to what relatives will wear.

The bride explained that she and her fiancé chose a specific shade of blue and a stretch satin fabric from what she described as a relatively affordable bridal brand. From there, they decided to ask not only the bridesmaids, but also their mothers, sisters, and grandmothers to select dresses from the same website in that exact color and material.

She said they were strict about the fabric because—even in the same color—different materials can look noticeably different in photos.

Still, the request didn’t go over well. The bride wrote that her future sister-in-law called her inconsiderate, saying their mother hates satin and would be uncomfortable all day. According to the bride, her sister-in-law also criticized her for not checking with the mom about the fabric before finalizing the plan, even though the bride said she and her fiancé made the decision together.

The bride added that she has tried to be thoughtful toward her fiancé’s family in other ways. She said she changed the wedding destination from overseas due to her future in-laws’ legal status, accounted for their large immediate family, and worked to include Spanish elements in the ceremony since it is their dominant language.

In the end, she asked readers whether she was wrong for wanting her mother-in-law to wear satin and whether she had been inconsiderate throughout the planning process.

Many commenters pushed back hard on her approach, largely siding with the future mother-in-law. Several noted that dictating fabric choices for non-bridal-party guests isn’t customary, and that satin can be uncomfortable or unflattering depending on fit and personal preference. One commenter said they looked up the dresses from the selected company and felt none seemed appropriate for a middle-aged woman.

The most upvoted response argued that guests aren’t props for color coordination, and that asking people to spend money on something they didn’t get to choose—especially a fabric many find uncomfortable—crossed a line. Others echoed that the mother of the groom shouldn’t be required to buy from a specific brand or wear a specific material, and suggested providing a color swatch instead so she could choose something comfortable that still fits the wedding palette.

As one commenter put it: the bride’s vision shouldn’t come at the expense of someone else’s comfort—especially when that person isn’t part of the bridal party.