Woman Asks Husband to Stay Home with Kids as Her Sister Wants a ‘Child-Free’ Wedding. Then Bride Is Upset When He Doesn’t Attend

A mother is wondering if she’s out of line for asking her husband to skip her sister’s wedding so he can stay home and care for their children.

The woman shared her dilemma on Reddit, explaining that her sister is getting married in March and has decided on a child-free ceremony. The wedding is about seven hours away, and the poster is set to serve as maid of honor.

She and her husband have four young children, and finding childcare for an entire weekend has proven impossible. Their usual helpers — including her mother, mother-in-law, and sister-in-law — are either unavailable or attending the wedding themselves. With no other options, she asked her husband to stay back and watch the kids.

At first, her sister seemed understanding when told that the husband wouldn’t be attending. Later, however, the poster learned that her sister was deeply upset, saying she considers him like a brother and had expected him to be there.

In an effort to resolve the issue, the sister and her fiancé offered to pay for a babysitter and an Airbnb so the children could stay nearby while both parents attended the wedding. While appreciative of the gesture, the mother said she’s uncomfortable leaving her four kids in an unfamiliar place with someone she doesn’t know. She also shared that her oldest child, age 7, is already hurt about not being invited and that making him endure a long trip only to stay behind in a hotel feels unfair.

She asked fellow Reddit users whether she was wrong for feeling uneasy about the arrangement and for preferring that her husband stay home.

Many commenters sided with her, emphasizing that while her sister is entitled to a child-free wedding, she can’t dictate how guests arrange childcare.

“Not unreasonable at all,” one person wrote. “It’s fine to want a child-free wedding, but you don’t get to decide how someone else ensures their kids are cared for in a way they trust.”

Others acknowledged that hiring a sitter was a reasonable offer but agreed that the final decision should rest with the parents.

“I’ve had vetted caregivers watch my child in hotels while traveling,” one commenter shared. “But I don’t think it’s unreasonable at all that you don’t want to.”

They added that choosing a child-free wedding naturally comes with the understanding that some guests may not be able to attend.

Another commenter suggested that the sister’s reaction likely comes from wanting both spouses present and encouraged considering the babysitter option if the husband genuinely wants to go. They shared their own positive experience using a professional nanny during a child-free family wedding, while still noting that the choice ultimately belongs to the parents.

Still, many reinforced that having the husband stay home is a fair and practical solution — and that respecting parental boundaries is just as important as honoring wedding preferences.