Labor and Delivery Nurse Reveals the One Question Every Expectant Mom Should Ask Before Giving Birth at a Hospital

A labor and delivery nurse is urging expectant parents to ask a direct question before choosing where to give birth—because, she says, the answer can be a major clue about whether a hospital is set up to provide safe care.

Jen Hamilton, a mom of two and author of Birth Vibes, shared a TikTok video encouraging people to find out whether their chosen hospital follows AWHONN’s safe staffing standards.

“If you or someone you love is going to give birth in a hospital, there is a question that you need to ask before you go that can determine whether you are likely to have safe care or not,” Hamilton said in the video. She added that some hospitals “are going to be pissed” that she’s sharing it—but she wants the message to spread.

Hamilton stressed that she’s talking about standards, not casual advice.

“I did not say guidelines. I did not say suggestions. I said standards,” she said. According to Hamilton, those standards are specific about nurse-to-patient ratios in labor and birth. She said a labor nurse should care for no more than two patients, and even that should be “on a bad day.”

According to the Association of Women’s Health, Obstetric and Neonatal Nurses (AWHONN)’s website, the organization is “an association dedicated to the nurses who strive to provide cultural humility and gender inclusive care for all.”

AWHONN formed a special nursing task force—including multiple experts in perinatal nurse staffing—to develop a detailed document outlining recommended staffing standards. The material includes background and rationale for nurse-to-patient ratios, contingency staffing plans, disaster planning examples, and more.

Hamilton said she feels fortunate to work in a setting where staffing is usually safer.

“I am grateful. I am blessed to work in a place where most of the time I have one patient on a crazy day too, but never ever more than that,” she said. But she warned that some hospitals are operating with “egregiously unsafe staffing” because, in her view, accountability is lacking.

Hamilton also emphasized that unsafe staffing creates risks that aren’t about an individual nurse failing.

“When you have a nurse that is caring for more patients than they should be caring for, things happen by no fault of the nurse, just a fault of the system,” she said. “Hospitals need to be prioritizing safe staffing in order to provide safe care.”

In a follow-up video, Hamilton explained how she believes patients can ask the right people the right questions.

“Don’t call and ask for the director. Don’t ask your OB. You need to talk to the people on the ground,” she advised. Specifically, she recommends asking labor and delivery nurses how often they’re assigned more than two laboring patients.

Hamilton also shared what to do if someone learns their nurse is working what she describes as an unsafe assignment.

First, she said, don’t blame the nurse. Instead, she suggests asking to speak with the house supervisor—a role she said hospitals have on duty at all times—and clearly expressing concerns about staffing on the unit.

She then recommended two specific follow-ups:

1. Ask whether hospital administrators are aware of the unsafe staffing situation.
2. Ask for the concern to be documented in the medical chart—including that the patient is being cared for by a nurse with an unsafe assignment.

“That’s where it really gets spicy,” Hamilton said, adding that this kind of documentation request can prompt a fast response.