A Son’s Extended Family ‘Goes Wild’ with Lavish Presents. But His Parent Doesn’t Know How to Tell Them to Stop

After yet another round of generous birthday and holiday presents, a parent is trying to figure out how to convince their extended family to scale back.

In a post shared on Reddit, the parent explained that their 2-year-old son is the only child and only grandchild on both sides of the family. With no siblings or cousins—and relatives who live far away—gift-giving has become the main way many family members show love from a distance.

The result, the parent says, is chaos at home. Their son’s closet is “overflowing” with clothes, toys and books have taken over the house, and their “living room is essentially his nursery.”

They’ve been able to make progress with their own parents, who are “better about listening to what I need and what our space constraints are.” But one relative, they say, refuses to change: their uncle.

According to the parent, the uncle is twice divorced, doesn’t have children, and lives on disability checks. Since the child was born, the uncle has leaned into extravagant gifts—often huge, noisy items that don’t fit in their home and aren’t age-appropriate.

Last year, the uncle sent an electronic bumper car when the child was 15 months old. For his second birthday, the gifts escalated to a full kids’ drum set and an electric guitar.

The parent has attempted to steer things in a more practical direction by sending a wishlist, but says the uncle buys one recommended item and then adds “two loud and annoying things that he picked out.” They’ve also suggested alternatives—like gifting experiences (a children’s museum membership) or contributing to a college fund—but the uncle dismissed those ideas as “not fun.”

He insists he’s entitled to go big. “I’m a great-uncle, I’m supposed to spoil him!” he told them.

At this point, the parent feels the gift-giving has become more about the uncle than the child. Frustrated after another oversized gift arrived ahead of Christmas, they admitted they were at the end of their rope: “I am going to scream,” they wrote, asking readers whether they needed advice, solidarity, or simply a place to vent.

In the comments, one person offered a perspective that reframed the problem: people can give gifts, but they can’t dictate what happens afterward.

They explained that they accept gifts politely, keep only what fits their home and their children’s needs, and quietly return what they can—putting the money into a college fund. Anything else is re-gifted or donated. Most of the time, they added, nobody notices.

Their point was simple: the giver’s choice is to give; the parent’s choice is what stays. If a relative doesn’t like that, they can stop giving—and that’s okay.

Others echoed that strategy, saying they return or sell unwanted gifts when possible and put the money into their kids’ college accounts. One commenter said their family eventually started requesting no presents at all, and instead shared a link for relatives who wanted to contribute to a 529 plan—because holidays and birthdays were about spending time together, not piling up more stuff.