A bride-to-be is struggling to set her wedding date because her mother insists she schedule the event around her sister’s plans to start a family.
The bride shared her dilemma on Reddit’s “Am I the A——“ forum, explaining that she and her fiancé got engaged last summer and have already chosen their venue for the small wedding they envision. They are “strongly leaning towards” a May 2026 date, with September as a backup option.
However, the bride recently learned that her older sister is “trying for a baby” with her boyfriend. “She noted in her ideal world she would get pregnant fairly quickly and the baby would come around June,” the Redditor wrote.
Her mother immediately expressed concern about the wedding timeline, especially the May date, given the news about her sister.
“She was taken aback and pointed out that my sister might be very pregnant and unable to come to our wedding,” the bride explained. “I had considered this, but I also considered that it’s not guaranteed that she will get pregnant right away or at all, making it just as possible for her to be heavily pregnant in September.”
“Additionally, even if her ideal timeline did work, I live 600 miles away from her, so I doubt she would come to a September wedding with a newborn anyways,” she added.
Despite this, the bride’s mom “seemed certain” that the sister would get pregnant “right away” and accused the bride of being “inconsiderate” for wanting a May wedding.
The Redditor asked whether she was “the a——” for “not scheduling my wedding around my sister’s family planning.”
In the comments, most readers advised her to stick to her plans.
“You cannot possibly plan a wedding around what MIGHT be going on in someone else’s life,” one user wrote. “I can see why your mother would love your sister to be able to attend your wedding, but her advice is just not realistic or practical.”
Another commenter encouraged the bride to “do what works for you and your fiancé.”
“You have zero obligation to plan around your sister’s ‘plan’ to have a baby,” they said. “I hope she’s super lucky and can conceive exactly as planned, but a lot of women know it doesn’t always work like that. You shouldn’t have to sit in limbo waiting to see if your sister’s exact plan is happening.”
Someone else pointed out that “if people tried to plan around every wedding guest, no one would ever get married.”
Another added: “It’s one thing to plan around a known event, but it’s ridiculous to try to plan around an imaginary pregnancy.”
