Couple Calls Off Wedding After Groom’s Father Invites 20 Families Without Consent

A couple has decided to cancel their wedding and elope after the groom’s father sent their save-the-date cards to numerous strangers without their consent.

Sharing the story on Reddit’s “Wedding Drama” forum, the bride said she was “genuinely stumped” when her fiancé’s father distributed their wedding announcements to about 20 families the couple had never met. When he refused to “fix the issue,” they chose to call off the celebration altogether.

The pair had planned a “smaller” gathering of 70 close friends and family. When the groom’s father requested a copy of their save-the-date, they assumed it was for his mother, as they communicated regularly. They never imagined he would invite “at least 15-20 families each with spouses [and] kids.”

“I have never met any of these individuals and my fiancé has told me he doesn’t know many of them either,” the bride wrote. “It has been expressed to him that we did not approve this and he said that there’s nothing we can do.”

When the groom confronted his parents, the conversation went poorly.

“They’re angry. As we thought they would be,” the bride said. “They have said they see our POV but won’t reach out to fix the issue. They refused to let us know who they invited and won’t let us in the group message to make the situation right.”

The couple acknowledged that the groom’s parents had contributed to catering costs and understood that financial help often comes with some input on the event. However, they felt the unsolicited invitations were a major overstep. In response to being asked to disinvite the strangers, the groom’s parents “pulled half the funding they originally gave” the couple. “[They] basically told us unless we do it their way then they will not pay,” the bride explained. “We gave them the other half back as well. So they’re fully re-funded.”

Unable to find a compromise, the couple decided to cancel the event entirely.

“We have decided to cut our losses and cancel the original wedding we planned,” the bride said. “Looking back we always wanted a small, intimate wedding. It has turned into a bigger event than we wanted. We looked at finances/contracts and found we would lose less in deposits to cancel than we thought. We canceled everything.”

They now plan to elope within the next year and host a dinner party for close family and friends afterward. “We’re both very excited to finally do it how we want without outside pressure from others,” she added.

The bride said her in-laws will now have to inform the guests they invited that the wedding is canceled. “They’re angry now, but I know them. I know they will feel horrible about this situation when everything calms down,” she wrote.

Many Reddit users supported the couple’s decision, agreeing that a serious boundary had been crossed. “It’s your wedding, not his (groom’s father),” one top comment read. “Helping financially doesn’t mean he gets a say about the guest list.”