Father Asked by His Son’s Teacher to Cover Up His ‘Off-Putting’ Tattoos During Pick-Up and Drop-Offs

A father is questioning whether he was wrong to refuse covering his arms and legs after his son’s teacher said his tattoos were “off-putting” and claimed they violated the school dress code.

Posting to Reddit’s “Am I the A——?” subreddit, the 38-year-old dad explained that he, his wife, 36, and their 5-year-old son had recently moved from Seattle to a small town in Texas after inheriting his grandmother’s house.

The man noted that his heavily tattooed appearance and long hair were common in Seattle but stood out in their new community.

“I have a lot of tattoos, long hair, just a general look that really isn’t common here but was totally normal in Seattle,” he wrote. “I’ve gotten a lot of looks and some s— from people here, which I don’t really give a f— about, but suffice it to say my appearance doesn’t fit in.”

Until recently, his wife handled school drop-offs and pick-ups, but when their schedules aligned, they began going together. That’s when he first met his son’s teacher, a woman in her late 20s.

“I could just tell she was uncomfortable with my appearance from the jump,” he said, adding that he was wearing shorts and a tank top. After some conversation about how their son was settling in, the teacher asked him to cover his tattoos — which would mean covering nearly all skin below the neck — because she found them off-putting and said tattoos were against the school dress code.

The man refused immediately, pointing out that he wasn’t a student, so dress code rules didn’t apply to him.

“Besides, none of my tattoos that are visible when I’m clothed to any degree can be considered offensive unless you find the very idea of tattoos offensive,” he explained. When the teacher insisted, both he and his wife became irritated and told her he wouldn’t change his attire or stop picking up his child.

Afterward, the couple called the principal to set up a meeting and clarify whether such a policy even existed. They also planned to monitor how the teacher and classmates treated their son.

In a follow-up post, the father said they met with the principal and vice principal before school let out.

“Turns out those of you who said this was probably the teacher overstepping and not an actual rule were totally right,” he wrote. The principal confirmed that while tattoos are prohibited for students and teachers, parents can dress as they wish as long as they are appropriately covered.

While the principal avoided directly criticizing the teacher, she admitted the request “wasn’t right” and attributed it to the teacher’s inexperience. She also agreed to move the child to a different class if there were any signs of unfair treatment.

The experience has the family considering moving again sooner than planned. “Even before we got here, the plan was to not stay for any longer than three years, but honestly, we might be moving before the end of this one because my wife and I really despise it here and our son seems so let down every weekend,” he said.

He also stressed the importance of setting an example for his son. “I don’t want my son to think it’s okay for other people to tell him to look a certain way just to make them comfortable, nor do I want him to think it’s okay to treat others that way,” he wrote. “I don’t think teaching him to conform is ever a good thing. I also don’t think trying to conform actually makes people accept you any more, but that’s just me.”

Many Reddit commenters supported him, saying he was right to stand his ground and advocate for his family.

“As long as you, your wife, and your son show up in clean clothing that covers the necessary parts, and are polite and respectful of others, she has no business trying to police you at all,” one user wrote.

Another added, “Kudos. Standing up to an overbearing authority figure takes guts. The teacher’s dress code obsession is petty and misdirected. Your son will benefit from having a parent who isn’t afraid to assert their individuality, even if it ruffles some feathers.”