Healthcare Worker Told She Is ‘Too Emotional’ for Grieving the Death of Long-Term Patient

Working in healthcare can be emotionally overwhelming, and sometimes those emotions become visible in moments of grief and connection.

One woman recently shared a difficult experience where her natural empathy clashed with her workplace’s expectations.

“Last week, a long-term patient I’d been helping passed away,” the 32-year-old wrote in a Reddit post. “It hit me hard. I tried to stay composed, but I got teary-eyed at the nurse’s station.”

Her response, though human and heartfelt, quickly turned into a point of conflict. “My boss pulled me aside and said, ‘You can’t cry here. It makes patients uncomfortable. You’re too emotional for this line of work,’” she recalled.

Rather than suppress her feelings, she stood up for herself. “I told her compassion isn’t weakness, and if I stop feeling, I shouldn’t be in this job,” she responded.

Instead of offering support, her boss instructed her to “check my attitude,” and she was later called into HR for a discussion on “professionalism.”

“Now I’m wondering if I overstepped by defending myself,” she asked the online community.

Supportive comments quickly poured in from people who had experienced similar moments of empathy from healthcare workers.

One user shared the story of their mother’s final moments: “My mom passed away unexpectedly in the hospital. The one nurse who took care of my mom until the end — and even made the call — you could tell she cried. Especially when she saw us saying our final goodbyes.”

They added that they contacted the hospital afterward to praise the nurse’s compassion and express how deeply her kindness mattered.

Another commenter described a moment in the ICU after saying a private goodbye to their mother. An ICU nurse spoke quietly to them: “She told me she could tell I was strong and would make it through this, and she had tears in her eyes. It was such a moment of both strength and compassion, and it’s burned in my mind.”

The responses overwhelmingly affirmed that empathy doesn’t diminish professionalism — it enhances it.