A man is struggling to figure out how to tell his wife that he needs a little time to himself after work before jumping into his role as a dad.
On Monday, Aug. 4, he shared his story on Reddit’s AITAH forum. He explained that ever since he and his wife had their second child, he has been working six days a week. They decided he would be the main provider while his wife stayed home with their kids — who are 9, 6, and 2 years old — to save on childcare costs.
“I work in healthcare, so my days can be intense and stressful,” he wrote. “By the time I get home, I’m emotionally and physically drained, and lately I’ve been feeling burned out.”
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He said that while he can focus at work, once he’s home, he feels completely out of energy. “I’m there physically, but I don’t have much patience and I’m not fully present,” he admitted.
The man counts his commute as part of his personal “me time.” At night, once the kids are asleep, he scrolls on his phone, plays games, or watches TV. He also goes for a run once a week.
Still, some days he walks in the door and hears his wife say, “Tag, they’re yours, I need a break.” While he understands she’s tired from caring for the kids all day, he wishes he could have a short break before switching from “work mode” to “dad mode.”
He asked the forum, “Am I wrong for wanting some me time when I get home?”
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Many people offered advice, such as hiring a babysitter for a few hours a week or setting up a clear agreement with his wife about a short rest period after work.
One commenter shared a tip from a marriage counselor: give the husband 10–15 minutes to unwind after work, but once that time is over, he needs to step in and help with the kids right away.
