Man Takes Teenage Son on 3-Day Vacation to Bond, but Wife Says They’re ‘Excluding’ Her

A father is facing tension at home after organizing a short getaway with his 13-year-old son from a previous marriage—without including his current wife or their toddler.

Sharing his story on Reddit’s “AITAH” forum, the man explained that he had planned a three-day trip to San Diego, simply to spend quality time with his teenage son. The two hadn’t had much time alone together in recent years due to shifting custody arrangements and a busy household dynamic.

Following his divorce eight years ago, the man and his ex-wife initially shared 50/50 custody. For a few years, his son lived with him on weekdays. But due to career demands and his ex-wife’s access to better schools, the teen eventually began spending weekends with his father instead.

Now remarried and a parent to a toddler, the man said he and his current wife had taken two child-free trips in the past two years. Other than that, he noted, “We had not a single night alone together for 20 months.”

When he asked his son how he wanted to spend summer break, the teen had one simple request: a trip to the beach.

Seeing a chance to connect one-on-one, the dad planned the short vacation—only to be met with frustration from his wife. She hadn’t been involved in the planning, which he attributed to her job as a flight attendant. Since she travels most weekends, the father said his time with his older son is often shared with their toddler.

“This means my weekends with my 13-year-old are alone with his baby brother, making it challenging for us to have any quality time together just he and I,” he explained. “This means my son has gone from having his dad every night, to 50/50, to weekends, and then to weekends shared with a baby.”

Feeling guilty about the loss of time together, the dad said he simply wanted to rebuild their bond.

Still, his wife felt hurt by the decision, telling him she believed it was excluding her and their young son. “She feels her and our new son are being excluded and that it is dividing the family,” he added.

The father acknowledged her feelings but stood by his intentions, saying he hoped their teen’s need for individual attention would outweigh the discomfort.

“In a couple years when our youngest is older, this would 100% be a family trip,” he wrote. “We all know how disruptive a small child can be when doing anything, and my 13-year-old has that every single weekend. I wanted him to have this trip without that.”

He also mentioned that he and his wife already have a road trip planned for later in the year, emphasizing that this was not replacing any time he intended to spend with her.

Still, tensions remain high. The man said his wife has been “ghosting” both him and his son over the situation.

After asking if he was in the wrong, many commenters quickly backed the father.

“Your wife gets you all the time. Your 13 yo has very limited time with you, and it’s shared time. Your son having one trip alone with his dad won’t hurt her,” one person wrote, adding that the wife “sounds jealous and immature.”

Another chimed in with concern: “Is she always this resentful of your son? Check in with him and make sure she hasn’t been unkind to him.”

A third commenter highlighted the urgency of the situation. “Soon there will be high school, part-time jobs and activities that are not hanging with parents. You should take your older son on the trip! Your wife needs to understand how important this is,” they said.