Man Tells Brother’s Wife That She’s in Bed Too Much as a New Mom. Now, Husband Is Mad at His Brother for ‘Hurting’ Her Feelings

A man is facing widespread backlash online after admitting he told his brother’s wife not to “stay in bed so much” just five months after she gave birth.

In a post shared on Reddit’s AITA forum, the man described why he confronted his sister-in-law, saying she wasn’t doing her share around the house. The new parents, he explained, were already overwhelmed by the demands of caring for their baby while managing work and household responsibilities — but he felt his brother’s wife wasn’t contributing enough.

The husband works full-time, while his wife stays home with their 5-month-old. Since the man lives nearby, he occasionally drops in to help.

“But lately every time I go there she’s in bed scrolling on her phone or saying she needs a break,” he wrote. “The house is a mess, bottles everywhere, laundry not done, dishes in the sink, baby crying most of the time.”

He said he “lost [his] cool” after visiting one weekend and seeing his brother cooking dinner with one hand while holding the baby with the other — as his wife rested in bed watching television.

When he asked if she was okay, she replied, “Yeah, a bit exhausted.”
He responded, “Being at home doesn’t mean you should always be in bed scrolling or watching TV.”

The exchange made the new mother cry, and she later told her husband what had been said. The husband confronted his brother, angry that he’d upset her. The man insisted he hadn’t meant harm — he simply felt sorry for his brother “doing most of the housework.”

Commenters on Reddit overwhelmingly sided against the man, pointing out that his sister-in-law’s behavior could reflect postpartum depression and that she might still be physically and hormonally recovering from childbirth.

“The baby is only five months old. She might be up all night feeding or comforting the baby. She may still be recovering. She may have PPD,” one commenter wrote. “She’s in survival mode, and your judgment about the house isn’t helping.”

Others also challenged his phrasing that the husband “helps with the baby,” arguing that caring for a child is a shared parental responsibility, not an optional favor.