A man is asking if he was wrong for stopping financial support for his ex-wife’s 6-year-old daughter after their divorce.
In a post on Reddit’s Am I the A——? forum, he explained that the situation involves his ex-wife, his former stepdaughter, and his biological daughter.
“I was with my ex-wife Amy for four years. We have an 18-month-old daughter, Wynne. We divorced last year. Amy has a 6-year-old daughter, Ella, whose father is not involved,” he wrote.
During their marriage, he said he covered almost all expenses for Amy, who was a stay-at-home mom, as well as for Ella and their newborn.
“The whole time I treated Ella no differently than I treated Wynne. I got her everything she needed and cared for her as a parent should,” he explained. “Once we split, we agreed to 50/50 custody of Wynne. I also pay for her insurance and give monthly support because I make more money than Amy.”
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He said he wanted his daughter to have a comfortable life. But tension grew when he told Amy he no longer wanted to financially support Ella.
“When I pick up Wynne, we go do fun things like the zoo or other activities. She also often gets new clothes and shoes,” he said. “Amy thinks it’s unfair that I won’t continue supporting Ella after four years and says I abandoned my ‘daughter.’ I feel she’s no longer my responsibility.”
According to him, both Amy and his mother were upset about his decision. “I know Amy cannot afford to give Ella the life we used to give her, but why should I have to do it? My mom thinks I’m a massive a—— because she sees Ella as her granddaughter just like Wynne,” he shared. He added that if he was wrong, he would accept it and continue to help Ella.
Reddit users were divided, but many pointed out that Ella likely sees him as her father and could be deeply hurt by his withdrawal.
“You’ve been this kid’s dad for most of her life. You gave her a sister,” one commenter wrote. “Now that you’re not with her mother, you say she’s no longer your daughter? That’s worse than her biological dad not being involved, because you chose to be in her life and now you’re discarding her.”
Others argued that he has no financial obligation toward Ella. “If he wants to take Ella out sometimes with his daughter, that’s fine. But why should he pay for her life? Shouldn’t her real father be paying child support?” one user wrote.
Still, several commenters urged him to think about Ella’s perspective. “She didn’t hurt you, and none of this is her fault,” one said. “You are the only father she has ever known. Excluding her now and only caring for your biological daughter is cruel. From her point of view, her parents divorced and now her dad only loves her little sister. That’s confusing and painful for a child.”
