Mom Defends Decision to Skip Child’s Party Because Parents Won’t Lock Up Their German Shepherds

A mom on Reddit is opening up about her decision to let her 8-year-old son miss a friend’s birthday celebration — and her reasoning has sparked a lively debate online.

In a post on Reddit’s Am I the A–hole forum, she shared that her son was invited to a classmate’s birthday party at the family’s home. The two boys had been close the previous year, often playing together outside of school. But the mom discovered that her son didn’t enjoy visiting his friend’s house because the family owned two large German Shepherds.

“This family are big dog people,” she explained. Because of that, she said she usually organized playdates at her own home or somewhere neutral. “I gently worked it where the friend would come over to our house or go to a 3rd space,” she added. “More recently, sports have picked up and so there is less time for these hangouts, so we haven’t had to address or avoid going to this friend’s house.”

When the new party invitation arrived, she checked in with her son. “I asked him if he wanted to go,” she wrote. “He said only if the dogs weren’t there. I said okay.”

The mom reached out to the birthday boy’s parents to ask if they could put the dogs away during the party, but they declined. “They said it’s the dogs’ house, and if they put them away, they’d destroy the room they’re in,” she recalled.

After that, she told them her son wouldn’t be attending. “They got mad,” she wrote, adding that the party was scheduled for the following weekend.

Once she shared the story online, hundreds of commenters weighed in — many siding with the mom’s decision.

“Your son doesn’t want to go because there are big dogs that scare him, and you support him,” one commenter said. “You’re not raising a spoiled child; you’re raising someone who knows how to recognize when they’re uncomfortable.”

Another agreed: “If he’s uncomfortable, he should not go. The other parents were wrong for getting upset. They made their choice, and you and your son made yours.”

Others, though, pointed out that both sides were entitled to their boundaries.

“They’re free to do what they want with their dogs in their house. But you’re free to decline their invitation,” one person noted.

Another summed it up succinctly: “Your son isn’t wrong for not going because he’s not comfortable with the dogs. They’re not wrong for refusing to put the dogs away. You’re not wrong for politely declining the invitation on your son’s behalf.”