A mom turned to the AITA subreddit to ask if she was wrong for not wanting her son’s grandmother to take him on a trip two hours away.
The original poster (OP) explained that their husband’s stepmother goes camping every weekend. While OP has allowed their 3-year-old son to join some of these trips—either alone or with their husband—there’s a recurring concern.
“The problem is 2 separate times now she has planned to take my child camping 2 hours away without asking or even telling us,” OP wrote.
OP shared that the first time they discovered the grandmother’s plans, it was their teenage sister-in-law who alerted them. The second instance happened just minutes before OP posted on Reddit.
“The second time was 10 minutes ago,” OP said. “I asked her if she planned on taking him camping because he has been having some bathroom issues. She stuttered before admitting it (you could tell she had no intention to tell us).”
OP ended the post asking if they were wrong for refusing to let their son go on the trip without prior notice.
Many commenters sided with OP, agreeing that it was reasonable to refuse a trip two hours away without parental knowledge. One user suggested pausing overnight visits until the grandmother rebuilds trust.
“Sounds like it is time for no overnight visits until she can be honest about where your child is going to be,” the user wrote. “What happens if your child gets bit by a rattlesnake, and you don’t know where he is? What happens if he breaks a limb? What happens if she gets hurt and he’s left there alone while you assume he’s at her house? But they’re out in the woods.”
“What she is doing is dangerous. A parent should know where their child is at all times even if they’re with other family members,” they added. “You need to put your foot down and set boundaries before something bad happens.”
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Another user emphasized the risks associated with a trip so far away and the importance of clear communication.
“Consider that this trip is potentially 150 miles (or more) away from you. Without knowledge of the trip, in the event of an accident (car) where the adults are unable to contact you, your child is literally lost,” they wrote. “This is a situation that no parent wants to imagine, and it could end tragically.”
“Zero tolerance is the only way forward. If they inform you and all are consenting, great—but to take off without you being asked is absolutely kidnapping in my view. You should address these issues and not allow your child to go unless there is clear communication regarding any excursions out of town.”
Other commenters reinforced that OP shouldn’t leave their son with his grandmother without one of the parents present.
“Until you are satisfied she won’t try this again, make sure your son is never in her care without you or your husband present,” one person wrote. “As a parent, you have the right to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to such excursions.”
