Mother Says She Wants to Remove Her Child from Nursery After Issue with Another Parent at Christmas Event

A mother is debating whether to move her 14-month-old daughter to a different nursery after discovering her child appeared in a video shared online without her permission.

Writing on the community forum Mumsnet, the mother said her daughter has been “thriving” since starting nursery in September. However, because of work commitments, she hasn’t been able to attend all of the nursery’s Christmas events.

That changed when she came across a video posted online from the nursery’s recent carol service — and noticed her daughter was clearly visible.

“We do not share photos of my daughter online, we don’t even share her name online,” she wrote. She added that the nursery has a firm policy against filming on the premises and reminds parents of the rule before events.

The mother said she messaged the parent on Instagram, asking them to remove the video, but it didn’t appear to have been read.

According to the post, nursery staff told her there was little they could do immediately beyond requesting removal the next time the child attends.

“I am absolutely livid that my child has been shared online without my consent (which they would never, ever receive anyway) and now feel like the nursery cannot keep her safe,” she wrote.

“AIBU [am I being unreasonable] to seriously consider removing her from the setting?” she asked.

In replies, many commenters sympathized with her frustration and encouraged her to raise the issue with the nursery as a safeguarding concern. But several also cautioned that switching settings may not eliminate the risk, given how common phone filming has become at school and childcare events.

One person suggested escalating it through the platform itself if the video could pose a safety risk, while still acknowledging there’s no guarantee another nursery would handle things differently.

Others pointed out the broader impact these situations can have, noting that children at heightened risk may miss out on events entirely because families can’t be sure images won’t end up online.

At the same time, some responses argued that removing the child would be an extreme step, saying it can be difficult to completely prevent discreet filming in group settings — and that similar problems could arise elsewhere.

A handful of commenters were more blunt, questioning whether the mother was overreacting and noting that many nurseries allow filming while asking parents not to post publicly.