Teenager Reveals the Final Straw That Made Her Move in with Dad After Mom Prioritizes Her Half-Siblings

Dealing with divorced (or separated) parents can be complicated — especially when you feel pulled between two households with very different expectations.

In a Reddit post, a 16-year-old asked if she handled her situation the right way after deciding to live with her dad full-time and create distance from her mom and stepfamily. She explained that her parents had her while they were in college and split up before she was born. Although both parents have stayed involved and shared custody over the years, she recently chose to change that arrangement.

“For years my mom and I have fought for 90% of the weeks I was with her. I hated sharing a room with two of my half sisters and my mom hated that I hated sharing. She would tell me loads of kids share and she’d ask me why I’d be fine with sleepovers at my friends houses but not sharing a room with my half sisters. We’d fight that dad would buy me things and I’d keep them at his house instead of bringing them to share with my half siblings,” the teen wrote.

She said her mother often insisted that everything needed to be “fair” between her and her half-siblings — including who was invited to outings and how items were shared — and that this created constant conflict.

According to the teen, those fights escalated over the last few years, especially around birthdays. She said her dad would take her and her friends out to celebrate, which her mom resented because her younger half-siblings weren’t included.

“In the last four years those fights got worse because my dad would take me and my friends places for my birthday. This year it was Aquatica and my mom was pissed that my half siblings weren’t invited but my friends were,” she wrote. “I didn’t want my half siblings there. I wanted my friends. My half siblings would have been a burden on the day because they’re younger than me and my friends and they’re not dad’s kids and he hasn’t any kind of relationship with them so it would have been miserable trying to figure out what to do with them and it was meant to be my birthday.”

She said the breaking point came after she brought a room divider into the shared space. Her mom reportedly told her she should have asked her half-sisters first, but the teen felt she was simply trying to create basic privacy.

“I told her I deserved privacy, and she told me I didn’t deserve it when I act like it’s torture to be in the same room as my half sisters in the first place. She said it’s meant to make us closer and I’m trying to wall them off,” she wrote. “She called me a brat, and she told me she knew what dad’s house was like and how selfish I am to hoard so much stuff there. She didn’t say how she knew but she was pissed enough that she told me I was going to be grounded for a month for being such a brat. I told her I was done and was going to live with my dad.”

The teen said her mom argued that a permanent move would disrupt the household, but the teen didn’t want to keep sharing a room through the rest of her teenage years. She added that their court order allows her to choose where she lives once she turned 16 — and she decided to do exactly that.

“I’m glad to live with dad full time. I have seen mom three times in the last 4 months. I don’t go to her house overnight and the one time I did go over for dinner I left before it was served and I told her I wasn’t going back. She’s mad at me and she told me I’m making childish decisions with my teenage brain and I’m destroying so many of my relationships with my childish brain. I told her I don’t care, because I don’t, which pissed her off even more,” she wrote.

She then asked the Reddit community whether she was wrong for setting that boundary and stepping away.

Commenters largely supported her decision, arguing that her mother was ignoring what she had been asking for — and that forcing “fairness” wasn’t actually improving family relationships.

“How does she expect you to become closer with your half-siblings when she’s doing everything within her willpower to do the opposite of what you’re telling her would help? She’s ignoring boundaries,” one person wrote. “She can’t expect you to take this responsibility, nor your father. They’re not his kids. The comment about why your friends but not your half-siblings; you choose your friends and not your family. What does your dad think of all of this?”

The teen replied that her dad avoids sharing his opinions about her mom and tries not to speak negatively about anyone in the other household.

“My dad doesn’t talk to me about his thoughts or feelings on this. I hope he does when I’m over 18. But he always tries to live by the ‘don’t say negative stuff about the other parent or other family.’ ”

Another commenter suggested her mother may not accept the seriousness of the situation until the consequences fully sink in.

“Your mother has been in denial for years. Maybe she’ll come to her senses when she realizes what she’s done to you,” the person wrote.