Woman Cussed Out by Her Boyfriend’s Kids After She Tried to Set Rules. Now, She’s Refusing to Cook for Them Until They Apologize

A woman has taken to Reddit’s AITA forum to ask whether she’s wrong for refusing to cook or clean for her partner’s stepdaughters after they verbally attacked her during a family trip.

The original poster (OP), 30, explained that she has been with her 45-year-old partner for just over a year, though they’ve known each other for three. They decided to move in together when her lease ended — a decision she now admits may have been premature.

Recently, OP joined her partner and his three children, ages 12, 14, and 16, on a camping trip. During the outing, the two youngest daughters met a group of 18-year-old boys who had been drinking and wanted to hang out with them at their campsite.

OP’s partner refused, but when the girls protested, OP stepped in to back him up. She told the girls it wasn’t appropriate for underage teens to spend time with intoxicated adults and even offered to accompany them to the boys’ campsite, which they declined.

“Well, the girls turned on me — full yelling, name-calling, being totally disrespectful,” OP wrote. “My partner said nothing. I went to bed pissed off. I was only looking out for them and having my man’s back.”

Over the next two days, OP and her partner discussed what happened. While he told her to move on, OP said she felt deeply disrespected by the girls and believed an apology was owed. She told him she no longer felt comfortable “cooking, cleaning, and providing for people” who insulted her.

When the girls later returned home from their mother’s house, OP cooked a lamb roast for her partner’s son’s birthday — but reminded her partner that she wouldn’t be cooking for the daughters. At dinner, she told the girls, “Since you said I’m not your mother, it’s not my job to put food on the table.”

The comment set off another argument, with the girls yelling and cursing while her partner accused OP of ruining the evening.

The next morning, tension filled the house. OP said she felt unsupported and asked Reddit whether she had gone too far.

In the comments, many readers sided with OP, saying the relationship had moved too quickly and criticizing her partner for failing to set boundaries.

“You need to move out and find another place to live,” one commenter wrote. “Your partner should have stopped all of the conflict a long time ago. This is a no-win situation.”

Another agreed:

“He should not allow his kids to disrespect you in any way. He’s wrong and should have had your back.”

Others felt OP could have handled the situation with more care.

“A better way would have been to calmly say, ‘I don’t tolerate disrespect, so your dad will handle meals and cleanup until that changes,’” one user advised. “But don’t spring it on hungry kids at dinner.”

Some concluded that both OP and her partner were at fault:

“Everyone sucks here,” one commenter wrote. “You both moved in too soon. If it was too early for you as adults, it was definitely too early for the kids — no wonder they’re acting out.”