Woman Cuts Off Friends After Finding Out They Secretly Had a Girls’ Night Without Her

A 30-year-old woman says she was deeply hurt after realizing her closest friends had organized a night out — and even created a separate group chat — without including her.

In a post on Reddit, she explained that these were the same friends she’d shared holidays, birthdays and breakups with over the years, which made the exclusion sting even more.

She wrote that she discovered they’d had “a whole girls’ night last weekend — wine, dinner, matching outfits, the works” and that she “wasn’t even invited.” She only found out when one of them posted about the outing on Instagram Stories.

When she texted the group joking, “Wow, thanks for the invite,” one friend responded, “Oh, we figured you’d be busy.” The woman said the excuse felt dismissive and out of touch with her real life. “Busy with what? My thriving social life? My imaginary boyfriend?” she wrote, adding that in reality she had been at home “folding laundry and eating pasta.”

What hurt even more, she said, was realizing that the get-together must have been planned in a separate group chat that intentionally excluded her.

“Someone literally said, ‘Let’s make a new chat without her,’” she wrote. “Do you know how humiliating that feels at 30? Like you’re in middle school again, except now everyone has matching Stanley cups and passive-aggressive captions.”

Feeling embarrassed and unwanted, she left their existing group chat and stopped responding to their texts. That prompted one friend to message her directly asking, “You’re really going to ghost us over one night?”

The woman said she isn’t simply upset about a single missed outing, but about a pattern of being sidelined and then told to “not take it personally.” She turned to Reddit to ask whether she was “overreacting” or “finally reacting appropriately to people who never really valued me in the first place.”

Many commenters empathized with her and shared similar experiences of realizing certain friendships weren’t as mutual as they’d believed.

“This exact thing happened to me about 15 years ago. Dropped them and never looked back. Having no friends is way better than having fake friends,” one user wrote.

Another added, “Yes, this is a good life lesson that I had to learn too. I refuse to be treated poorly by ‘friends.’ I cut those people out and am completely comfortable being on my own.”