Woman Debates Breaking Up with Boyfriend Over His Mom’s Unfiltered Personality: ‘Absolute Nightmare’

A woman turned to Reddit for advice after feeling torn between a relationship she cherished and the possibility of a very uncomfortable future with her partner’s family.

The 25-year-old explained that she has been dating a 26-year-old man for almost a year. She believes they’re well-suited and shares that they initially connected through mutual friends online, despite living far apart, with “an 8-hour flight” between them.

As they grew closer, he revealed that this wasn’t the first time he had known her. They had actually been classmates years earlier, and he confessed he’d liked her since they were teenagers. “He told me he has known me since 8th grade,” she wrote, adding that he admitted he had been too shy to speak to her back then.

Even with the distance, their bond deepened quickly. She described him as incredibly kind and considerate, calling him “a huge green flag.” She said he is so gentle that even minor disagreements leave him looking “like a sad cat,” and their two arguments made her feel guilty because he seemed unable to handle conflict at all.

Her worries, though, weren’t about him as a partner. Instead, she said the real problem was his family. “His parents are an absolute nightmare,” she wrote, noting that although she hadn’t met them in person, she had frequently heard them yelling at each other in the background during calls.

She described them as loud, aggressive and unwilling to resolve their issues in a healthy way.

According to her boyfriend, his mother in particular has “no filter and says whatever she wants,” even when her comments are cruel. He has told her multiple stories about his mother openly insulting guests.

In one example, a friend visited to show off a new haircut, only to be told it made him look “even uglier.” In another, a visitor was bluntly told he had become “really fat.” The woman said it has reached the point where his friends avoid coming over because they’re afraid of being mocked.

As someone who describes herself as “chubby and short,” the poster admitted she is deeply anxious about becoming the next target.

“I’m scared of being talked down to like that,” she wrote, explaining that she has dealt with similar treatment before and doesn’t want to relive it.

What troubled her even more was her boyfriend’s reaction. When she shared her fears, he simply advised her not to take it to heart. “He told me that if his mum ever says anything bad, I should just bear with it and ignore it,” she wrote, making it clear she did not feel okay with being expected to quietly endure those insults.

She also acknowledged that the idea of marrying into a family like this made her uneasy. “I really don’t want that kind of in-laws,” she admitted.

Reddit users were direct in their responses. One commenter wrote, “NTA. This guy is not a green flag he is a massive red flag,” urging her to end the relationship altogether. Another agreed that she wasn’t in the wrong and added, “You should definitely dump him… this is just the beginning.”

Now, she’s left wondering whether she’s wrong for seriously considering walking away from the relationship because of the way his family behaves—and his expectation that she simply put up with it.