Woman Discovers Her Parents Used Her Credit Since She Was 12, so She Sends Them an Itemized Bill

A woman has shared on Reddit how a shocking family secret led to a painful standoff with her parents — and a firm refusal to co-sign their mortgage refinance.

At 26, the first-generation college graduate revealed that her parents had been using her credit since she was just 12 years old. When she found out the extent of the damage, she sent them an itemized bill for the financial fallout instead of signing their new loan papers.

She explained that her mother first opened an internet account in her name when she was in middle school. “My mom put the home internet in my name ‘to build credit,’ ” she wrote. “I didn’t understand what that meant — I just signed something at the kitchen table while doing math homework.”

Over time, she discovered even more accounts tied to her Social Security number: cable in 2014, a furniture store card in 2016, and a family cell-phone plan when she turned 18. Though the charges weren’t extravagant, late fees began to accumulate.

When she applied for her first credit card in college, the bank rejected her application because her “utilization was 89 percent.” She didn’t understand the number then, but it would later make sense. “I felt stupid and powerless and went along because, ya know, family is family,” she wrote.

During her senior year, she paused school to care for her father after surgery. That’s when two utility accounts — opened in her name — went to collections. She only found out after debt collectors began mailing letters to her off-campus address. When she confronted her parents, they told her the problem would “fall off” her record and accused her of “being dramatic.”

Years later, the issue resurfaced when her parents asked her to co-sign a refinance for their home, calling it an “investment in our family legacy.” They admitted they were two payments behind and needed a strong co-signer. Suspicious, she pulled her full credit reports that night — and what she found stunned her.

She discovered seven accounts under her Social Security number that she hadn’t opened herself: “Two paid, three active, two in collections,” with late marks dating back six years. She realized just how costly the misuse had been. “When I bought my used Civic last year, my APR was 8.9 instead of the promo 3.1. That difference alone costs me about $172 a month — around $6,100 total.”

After her discovery, she told her parents she wouldn’t co-sign anything until the issue was resolved. She offered two options:

• Option A: They contact creditors, pay off balances, and write letters of explanation.
• Option B: She files police reports and fraud affidavits to block the accounts.

Her parents reacted angrily. Her mother cried; her father claimed she “owed them because they fed [her] for 18 years.” He even demanded she “repay the family debt” of roughly $12,000 they said they’d spent on her upbringing. “That was the moment something in me snapped,” she wrote.

Instead of backing down, she created a detailed spreadsheet listing every financial consequence she’d suffered — higher car interest, lost rental promos, utility deposits, hours on hold with credit bureaus, and two days of paid time off spent at the DMV freezing her credit. The total: $9,780, excluding stress or missed opportunities.

She printed the spreadsheet and mailed it to her parents along with copies of her credit reports. The letter, titled “Costs I Have Carried So Far,” concluded that she would not co-sign their refinance and expected them to take Option A — or she’d proceed with Option B by May 15.

The confrontation sparked what she called “nuclear fallout.” Her aunt accused her of “abusing” her parents with “fake paperwork.” Her father texted long messages about “loyalty,” insisting that “adults help family without keeping receipts.” Even her younger brother — still living with their parents — urged her to “just sign and fix it later.”

Her therapist reminded her that “boundaries are boring but necessary.” She froze her credit, added fraud alerts, and began documenting every communication in case legal action became necessary. “I will not sign liability for a 30-year mortgage I do not live in,” she stated.

She admitted she had stayed silent for years out of fear. “I know people will ask why I didn’t report this earlier. Truth is, I was scared of blowing up the only support system I had.”

Her parents later proposed family mediation. She agreed — on one condition. “I said yes if the mediator is neutral and not our pastor or my aunt,” she wrote. “If they agree, I’ll pause the fraud filings for two weeks. If not, I’m moving forward. It hurts, but letting this continue hurts too.”

Supportive Reddit commenters urged her to stand firm. “Your parents have been taking financial advantage of you for years. What they did is illegal. You’re being very kind giving them Option A,” one wrote. Others advised her to warn her brother to check his credit.

In an update, she shared that she did just that. “He’s still at home and kinda scared, but we set a time this weekend to pull Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion, then freeze and add alerts,” she wrote. “If there’s anything with his SSN, we’ll document, dispute, and file if needed.”