Woman Made Detailed Wish List for Christmas, but Then Husband Went Rogue, Thinking He Knew Best

A woman turned to Reddit after a disappointing Christmas exchange left her wondering whether she’d made too much of the situation.

She acknowledged that her feelings came from a place of comfort, writing, “I fully understand this is coming from a place of privilege but I don’t know if I’m being an AH.”

The 26-year-old said she has been married for three years to her 29-year-old husband, and they share an 18-month-old son. While gift-giving usually isn’t a major focus for her, she said this year felt different because she tried to be especially clear about what she wanted.

“This year I gifted my husband a very large and not cheap at all gun safe that he has been talking about for years,” she wrote, adding that it was something he’d “use for the rest of his life” and might even pass down to their child.

In previous years, she said, she kept her own requests simple—usually gift cards—and didn’t push for much. But this time, she made a list with specific items, including screenshots showing sale timing, promo codes, sizes, and a particular perfume she’d wanted for a long time. “I don’t know how much easier I could’ve made it on him,” she added.

The couple typically exchanges gifts before Christmas so the holiday morning can be focused on their son. When they opened presents, she said she received “a box of toiletries from Target” and four gingerbread houses she’d once mentioned liking.

Her husband also told her he’d gotten a $70 partial refund because some Target items were out of stock. She assumed he’d still buy the perfume she’d mentioned “at least 10 times,” but it never happened.

“I ended up getting it for myself while it’s 20% off,” she wrote. She initially tried not to make a big deal of it, but said the disappointment stayed with her—especially because none of the original items she’d requested were included.

Later, she told her husband she felt unappreciated by the gifts. According to her post, he called her ungrateful and then went to sleep on the couch.

She stressed that her reaction wasn’t about money. She said she works three days a week, pays half the bills, and takes care of their son on her days off. “I truly don’t know if I’m the AH here,” she wrote, asking whether her feelings were valid.

Commenters largely sided with her. One person noted that it wasn’t about the price tag, but about being ignored after putting effort into communicating clearly. Others were harsher, describing the gifts as rushed and thoughtless.

In a follow-up, the woman added another detail that made it sting more: her husband hadn’t even gone shopping. “He did a Target delivery,” she wrote, saying that only reinforced her sense that her effort hadn’t been matched.