Woman Upset After Husband Rejects ‘Lower Paying’ Job Offer While She Works Overtime to Support Them

A woman turned to Reddit for advice after a heated argument with her husband, who declined a new job opportunity because it paid less than his former position.

According to her post, her husband had been out of work for two months after losing his $90,000-per-year job. She clarified that he hadn’t been at fault for the loss but admitted that finding another role in today’s market had been tough. “I make $19/hr which isn’t much but does sustain us especially because I do a lot of overtime,” she explained, noting that she had been doing her best to support him emotionally and financially.

The woman said her job was physically exhausting. “Either on my 16 hr or 8 hr shift and I still have to figure out dinner and other chores,” she shared, emphasizing how the workload left her physically and mentally drained.

Meanwhile, her husband spent his days mostly at home. “He’s home all day, [goes] to the gym and [applies] for jobs online,” she wrote. At first, she avoided adding to his stress about being unemployed, but as time went on, resentment began to build as she felt her own exhaustion went unnoticed.

She recalled that when their roles were reversed — when she had been out of work for a year — she took responsibility for all the household tasks. “I was doing all the chores, cooking, cleaning laundry, his lunch, everything,” she wrote. “I wasn’t bringing any income so that’s the best I could do at the time.”

Now, being the only earner, she felt it was fair to expect her husband to help out. “I love my husband but I’m starting to resent how he’s not being considerate that I might be tired and try to help me,” she admitted, acknowledging that he was likely feeling low and discouraged.

Despite discussing the issue, little changed. “I’ve communicated this with him and he’s agreed to help but never [does] or he’ll jokingly say ‘ohh I have to cook coz I’m a bum,’” she wrote, adding that she still ended up handling everything herself. “I’m tired mentally,” she confessed.

Tensions came to a head when her husband finally received a job offer — but the pay was about $30,000 less than his previous salary. “He feels disrespected with that offer,” she explained, saying that although he asked for her input, it was clear he’d already decided against accepting it.

Trying to stay supportive, she told him, “Don’t take it then, I’ll support whatever decision.” But after he rejected the offer, she found herself overwhelmed with anger. “I did support him doing that but just realized I’m so angry that he actually denied that offer,” she wrote.

When asked by another Reddit user whether she had told him how she truly felt, she admitted that while they had spoken about many things, one topic remained untouched: “The only thing we haven’t spoken about is me telling him exactly how I feel about him turning down the job,” she said.