A woman recently shared her dilemma on Reddit’s AITA forum, explaining that she’s unsure how to handle her mother’s request to have her young children meet a brand-new boyfriend.
The original poster (OP) said her mother has a long history of quickly moving from one relationship to another. After just a week of dating her newest partner, the mom excitedly asked if OP’s kids — ages 6 and 3 — could meet him.
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However, OP admitted she felt “pretty uneasy” about the idea. Her concern deepened when her 6-year-old son recently asked if his grandmother’s last boyfriend had died. She didn’t know what to say, since they’d simply broken up. The question stirred up some old anxiety for her.
“My whole life, she chased men,” OP explained. “Hopped from man to man and never took it slow with introducing me to them. There was a new man on average every couple of months.”
Now 29, OP said this pattern has been ongoing since she was 8 years old. While she doesn’t want her kids to meet the new boyfriend, she also knows her mom tends to react poorly to boundaries.
“She’s really all about herself and plays victim anytime something doesn’t go her way,” OP wrote. “She doesn’t think about how her actions affect others.”
“My children are not something to show and tell. And I know how it feels to be promised things by people who just ‘disappear,’” she added.
OP said she’s considering telling her mom that while she understands her excitement, she isn’t ready for her kids to meet him yet. She asked Reddit if that approach made her the bad guy.
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In the comments, many supported her decision, encouraging her to prioritize her children’s emotional well-being and set clear limits.
One user wrote:
“Protect your children’s emotional and physical safety. Your mother is absolutely delusional to think your young children should meet a man she’s known for only a week. She doesn’t know this man — and neither do you.”
Another commenter emphasized that setting boundaries is not wrong:
“You’re simply doing what’s healthy. It’s understandable you don’t want your children to go through the same confusion you did. If your mother doesn’t agree, that’s her problem — not yours. You’re the parent.”
A third person offered a practical guideline:
“NTA. Set a limit of at least six months before you meet him. The kids can meet him several months after that, once you feel comfortable.”
