Bride Explains She Doesn’t Want Her Wedding Guests Bringing a Plus-One

A 27-year-old bride is grappling with whether it’s wrong to ask certain friends not to bring plus-ones to her wedding, while still inviting other guests’ partners.

In a post on Reddit’s AITAH forum, she explained that she and her fiancé want to keep their wedding small and manageable. They’re paying for everything themselves, and as an introvert, she finds the idea of being the center of attention in a large crowd overwhelming. To keep both the social and financial pressure down, they’ve started looking at one big lever: limiting plus-ones.

Over the years, the couple has built up a wide circle of friends, many of whom they consider close. When they did the math, they realized that if everyone got a plus-one, the guest list would land around 50 people.

“You might think it’s not a lot, but for someone who is an introvert, being the [center] of attention of 50 people for a good 9–12 hours sounds like hell to me,” she wrote. The total number of guests will also affect what venues they can book, and because many friends live far away, they’ll need to think about travel and overnight stays too.

To keep things smaller, the couple is considering a selective approach to plus-ones. For instance, the bride has a college friend group where everyone knows each other well, but she and her fiancé don’t really know their partners. In contrast, three of her friends from her hometown have long-term partners the couple knows and likes, so they feel inclined to invite those partners as well.

“But isn’t it an a—— move to tell some of them not to bring their partners while others can?” she asked. “I personally wouldn’t be offended if I was invited but told not to bring a +1, but I know some people could be.”

Commenters on Reddit were split. Some pointed out that plus-ones traditionally existed so a guest wouldn’t feel alone at an event where they didn’t know anyone, not as an automatic right to bring a partner. Others suggested that the context matters: small, intimate weddings naturally have tighter guest lists and more selective plus-one rules.

Several users urged the bride to consider the seriousness of each relationship. They noted that it’s typically seen as disrespectful to invite someone but exclude their spouse, while it may be more acceptable not to include a relatively new partner.

Ultimately, some commenters backed the bride’s instinct, saying that it’s her and her fiancé’s day — and with clear communication and consistent reasoning, they are entitled to set boundaries around the guest list and keep their wedding as small and comfortable as they need it to be.