Man Upset After Girlfriend Cancels Plans to Celebrate His Major Milestone Because She Doesn’t ‘Feel Like Going Out’

A man turned to the Reddit community seeking perspective after a highly anticipated celebration for passing his final exams took a disappointing turn.

In his post, he explained that after three demanding years of exams required to become chartered in his field, he was eager to finally relax and enjoy the moment with his girlfriend.

“With my job I have had three years worth of exams to become chartered in my field,” he wrote. “It was results day yesterday and my girlfriend and I had planned to go to an event at our favourite bar to celebrate if I passed or take my mind off it if I failed.”

The night was intended to be meaningful regardless of the outcome — but when he shared the news, the moment didn’t unfold as he imagined.

He passed, a milestone he deeply valued. However, when he told his girlfriend — who has been struggling with depression — she simply “did a little smile and mumbled well done,” he said.

Later, she told him they needed to cancel plans because she didn’t feel up to going out. Hurt and confused, he asked if she was serious, but “she just shrugged.” The celebratory evening he envisioned faded into withdrawal and silence.

He said his girlfriend “barely spoke for the rest of the night.” Eventually, she opened up and admitted she was “feeling s—,” but by then, he felt overwhelmed by disappointment. “I just asked if she could even pretend she gave a s— about me,” he admitted.

She responded with confusion, asking what he meant. He explained that he had just passed his final exams — yet it felt like “she didn’t even care.” To him, it wasn’t just the canceled plans; it was the lack of recognition during a major life achievement.

He shared additional context: when his girlfriend completed her master’s program, he put thoughtful effort into celebrating her success. “For context when she passed her masters I got her flowers, a card and we went for a night away to celebrate that I planned and paid for,” he wrote. The difference in support felt glaring.

When he expressed his feelings, she told him he “wasn’t being fair.” But he argued that canceling plans she knew were important to him, paired with minimal acknowledgment of his accomplishment, was hurtful. She insisted she “can’t help how she feels,” but he pushed back.

“Her feeling low doesn’t stop her from at least pretending to care about me and my achievements,” he said. He added, “I said there’s two people in the relationship when she seems to think it’s just about her.”

According to him, she called him “cruel,” but he defended his honesty, saying the situation left him feeling invisible. “It hurts that I was happy I’d passed and she couldn’t be bothered to be happy for me,” he wrote.

Seeking clarity, he asked Reddit: “AITA for being angry/upset that celebratory plans got cancelled?”

Comments came in with a mix of support and advice. One person wrote, “You’re not wrong for wanting to be seen. It’s possible to love someone with depression and still feel hurt when your joy gets ignored.”

Another commenter added, “NTA. Your celebration lost to depression, that’s tough ngl. Might be hard rn but try empathize, don’t invalidate her feelings. And don’t let yrs get invalidated either.”