A woman says she’s upset after discovering that clothes she had given to a friend ended up for sale on an online secondhand store — and she’s curious whether others would feel the same.
She shared her story on the “Am I Being Unreasonable?” forum on the U.K.-based community site Mumsnet.com, a space where women often seek advice about personal dilemmas.
In her post — and a later follow-up — the original poster (OP) explained that she had given her son’s hand-me-downs to a friend after the friend mentioned that her own son was “growing so fast.”
The OP noted that she typically donates clothes to “charity shops” and “women’s refuge centers” in her area, and that she assumed her friend — who shows “no signs of financial troubles” — would have done the same if she didn’t need the items.
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“It’s weirdly making me feel sentimental/pissed off,” the woman wrote, asking others whether they would be bothered in her position.
Commenters were split on whether her frustration was justified.
“I would think it’s a bit weird that they were cashing in on my kindness,” one person wrote. “Like you say, I’d rather they gave them to charity or someone else in need. If the items are good enough to sell, I’d at the very least ask the person that gave them to me if they want them back!”
Another agreed: “I feel it’s bad karma to profit off someone’s kindness.”
Others felt the OP should have set clearer expectations from the start.
“You should have said that you expected these to be passed on. Lesson learned,” one commenter suggested.
“You should lend and not give if you don’t want the recipient to sell them. Or sell them yourself,” another added.
Some took a different view altogether. “When you give stuff away, you cut ties with it. Let it go. You should not attach conditions to it,” one person wrote.