New Mom Says She’s Starting to Dislike Her Childless Friends Because of Their ‘Tone Deaf’ Jokes

A 24-year-old first-time mother says her relationships with some of her childless friends have grown tense, as their jokes about her new life as a parent increasingly feel insensitive.

The woman shared her experience on Reddit’s “Mom” forum, explaining that she became pregnant unexpectedly and welcomed her baby nine months ago. While motherhood wasn’t originally part of her plan, she says she has embraced it and formed a deep bond with her son.

“I never even thought about having kids, but I’ve accepted the role and formed a strong bond,” she wrote.

As the first person in her friend group to have a baby, she noted that many friends have been supportive of her life-changing transition. Others, however, have struggled to show empathy or understanding.

One particularly difficult moment came on a day when she was already emotionally drained. Her partner had gone to work, leaving her alone with her teething son, who was inconsolable and needed constant comfort. Household chores went unfinished as she focused on soothing him.

“I was sad because it hurt seeing him act this way,” she explained.

That same day, a close friend sent her a post that read something like, “When I’m having a terrible day but then I remember there are people my age with kids.”

“I just couldn’t bother responding,” the new mom wrote. “I wouldn’t be mad if she made the joke with another childless friend, but aiming it at me directly just felt insulting.”

In another instance, a different friend responded to her exhaustion by saying she hoped “the baby can shut the f— up so you can sleep.” The comment left her deeply uncomfortable.

“I didn’t like the tone at all and have been talking less to that friend,” she shared.

Beyond jokes, she said some friends fail to consider her new limitations when making plans. Because she is breastfeeding, she can’t be away from her baby for more than a few hours, and late-night outings or sleepovers are no longer realistic. While her best friend willingly adjusts plans to spend time together, others are unwilling to make accommodations.

“I know that I’ve grown softer and more sensitive since birth, but I don’t think I’m overreacting when I feel disrespected,” she wrote. “They speak about my life and my baby as if he’s a punchline about how miserable I must be.”

She emphasized that she doesn’t push motherhood onto others and fully respects her friends’ decision not to have children.

“I just feel sad,” she admitted, adding that she doesn’t yet have friends who are also moms. “The journey feels lonely sometimes. I’ve loved those friends so much.”

Commenters on Reddit were quick to offer support. One reassured her that her feelings were valid and praised her dedication to her child and her efforts to maintain friendships during such a major life transition.

Another encouraged her to value the friend who has consistently shown up, noting that not every friendship is meant to last forever.

Others echoed her feelings of isolation, pointing out that loneliness is common among new parents—even those with active social circles—and that seeking out other parents isn’t about replacing old friends, but about finding understanding.

“You deserve friendships where you feel supported, not judged,” one commenter wrote.

Some users were more direct, criticizing her friends’ language and behavior as inappropriate and dismissive, regardless of whether someone has children.